at this current stage.. i would say thanks to all those who have been speaking to me.. and also enduring my nonsense all these while.. although all hasn't come to an end yet.. but it might as well have been .. once again i crumbled and once again i laid myself on the altar and say if anyone needs to be placed on the altar so tat God can reign unchallenged in my heart.. let it be me... it has nothing to do with anyone else.. but its me and me alone. we as the guys we need to rise up.. we need to be the leaders as the head of the household..

it still hurts... no doubt.. every morning i wake to hope that it was a dream.. but it wasnt.. ... ... there is still chance everybody say.. but well.. all i can say is that this is a test.. a test of my very own heart to know if i really would go for it despite the opposition... the something that is fierce in my heart, that is willing to pursue .. jus like how i pursue God..